83. Opening Up After Infidelity, Breakups and Living with Your Metamours with Natalie Davis (author of Saying Yes)

Today, Ross and Eden, tantra practitioners, intimacy and relationship coaches, and community builders, share how they evolved from a very polyamorous dating life to a relationship that still leaves room for openness while honoring their nervous systems, emotional capacity, and desire to focus on each other.

Today I share my thoughts about The Invite, a movie about a married couple who invite their neighbors over for dinner. Things are awkward from the start, but they get even more awkward, funny, and real when an unexpected invitation to explore non-monogamy comes up.

Sarah Stroh talks about her book, Monogamaybe, her process coming to terms with her non-monogamous identity and finding a partner who supported her in that journey. We discuss how to manage and process jealousy and what agreements look like in non-monogamy when you want to be your best poly self but the reality is you’re struggling.

Cat, Natalie, and Joshua from The Kink Collective talk about their experience building a triad. We talk about honesty and transparency in non monogamy, especially when telling the full truth feels scary because you’re worried about your partner’s reaction, and what happens when you struggle to trust a partner who isn’t fully transparent. Natalie also shares her experience entering an established relationship, navigating Joshua’s other partners, and realizing she sometimes compared Cat to her own mom because of their significant age difference. Finally, we talk about letting go of expectations about what a relationship is “supposed” to look like and allowing their triad to develop organically.

When Courtney proposed opening their marriage on their 17th anniversary, their relationship was struggling. Nate was a devoted father and provider, but he had become emotionally distant. Courtney’s proposal was initially met with anger, judgment, and fears that she was trying to replace him.