Show Notes
In this episode, I’m joined by my friend and colleague, Anna Holtzman, for a conversation about self-trust, visibility, nervous system healing, and what happens after symptoms stop being the center of your life. We talk about the often-overlooked phase of healing where life starts opening back up again… and how terrifying that can feel when your nervous system has learned to associate visibility, expansion, creativity, and authenticity with danger. Together, we explore: Why healing often involves shrinking your world before expanding it again The fear of nervous system “repercussions” when you start taking up more space How perfectionism, people pleasing, and over-self-reliance disconnect us from ourselves The difference between regret and grief Why self-trust doesn’t mean certainty The role of co-regulation and safe relationships in healing The transition from borrowing belief to learning to self-source safety and trust Why “getting the right tool” can eventually become another protective strategy How to begin repairing your relationship with yourself This episode is for anyone who feels stuck between wanting more for their life and feeling terrified to fully step into it. About Anna: Anna Holtzman is a licensed therapist and coach who helps high-achieving women move through the fear of visibility and emerge into a truer expression of their work and identity. After 15 years in TV and publishing, Anna experienced firsthand how burnout, chronic pain, and repeated self-silencing can arise when success is driven by pressure rather than self-trust. Her own healing led her to nervous-system-informed tools that helped her reconnect with her voice and show up more honestly in her work. Now she supports other women in doing the same, melting through imposter syndrome, bringing their most authentic visions to life, and allowing themselves to be seen without performing. She lives in Queens with her husband, stepdaughter, and three orange cats, and hosts the podcast How to Trust Yourself. Connect with Anna: Website: AnnaHoltzman.com Free workshop: Let Yourself Be Seen Instagram: @anna_holtzman Podcast: How to Trust Yourself Anna’s Email: [email protected] Connect with Rachel: IG: thepelvicpaincoach Get Your Free Pain Flare Plan Get on the waitlist for a Pelvic Pain Strategy Session Get on the waitlist for Beyond Chronic Pelvic Pain (doors opening early summer)
Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
More from Heal Your Chronic Pelvic Pain
What can you do when a pain flare is loud, uncomfortable, and not something you can make stop in the moment? A building fire alarm kept going off for two weeks, sometimes during coaching calls and sometimes in the middle of the night. The experience reminded me of what it was like to live with chronic pelvic pain: knowing what was happening didn’t make the sensations disappear, and I couldn’t always change the situation right away. In this episode, I share how I supported myself through those moments, from putting in earbuds so I could keep coaching to noticing the comfort of my bed while I waited for the alarm to turn off. We talk about acknowledging discomfort without pretending it isn’t there, choosing what might support you, and considering whether you want to take a values-aligned action or rest. There’s no right or wrong choice. For me, showing up for the things I cared about, even when my symptoms were intense, supported my sense of agency. Your choice may look different. The invitation is to ask what you need and how you want to spend the time while you wait for the flare to pass. In this episode: Why knowing a symptom is a false alarm doesn’t always make the discomfort go away
If you've ever frozen on the exam table, or spent the drive home replaying everything you wish you'd said, this episode is for you. For so many of us with chronic pelvic pain, gynecologist visits are part of the recovery journey. And they can be really hard, both physically and emotionally. Many providers aren't trained in trauma-informed care or familiar with conditions like vaginismus and vulvodynia, which means it often falls on us to speak up for what we need. In this episode, I'm sharing the things I didn't know I could ask for when I was healing, so you can walk into your next appointment feeling more prepared and a little more in control. In this episode: Why telling your provider about pain with penetration out loud matters (even if it's already on your intake form)
When I was living with chronic pelvic pain, I believed that if I had symptoms, I was suffering. It felt impossible to enjoy my life or loosen my urgency to heal while pain was still there. Because I felt like I was always suffering.
Do you have to quit your job, leave your relationship, move, or completely restructure your life in order to heal?
Even though no one can do the healing work for you, that doesn’t mean you have to do it alone.