How To Have Sex

How to Have the Best Sex of Your Life

How To Have Sex

Show Notes

What actually separates good sex from great sex? Spoiler: it's not the positions, the toys, or the techniques. In this episode, sex and relationship coach Melissa Vranjes and Jay-Jay Feeney get into the real foundations of hot sex, and it turns out most of us have been thinking about it completely wrong. Mel introduces her erotic mind mapping method, breaks down the three types of desire (and why most women experience desire very differently to men), and explains why safety, connection, and communication are the actual ingredients for the best sex of your life. Plus: JJ gets her first Pleasure Practice assignment live on air, and it gets surprisingly vulnerable. This is sex education for real humans in real relationships. No pressure. No porn scripts. Just honest conversation.

For adults 18+. Headphones recommended. 🎙️ New episodes every Wednesday. Subscribe so you never miss one!

This podcast was produced at PodLab Studios, Auckland https://www.podlab.co.nz/ Bedding by Dehei https://dehei.co/

Mel's Sex Menu: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ELEGkI8NyWl2EAA9tYjlZ2oHs-q8ryns/view

Support the podcast! https://buymeacoffee.com/howtohavesex

INSTAGRAM https://www.instagram.com/howtohavesexpodcast FACEBOOK https://www.facebook.com/HowToHaveSexPodcast TIKTOK https://www.tiktok.com/@how.to.have.sex.p YOUTUBE https://www.youtube.com/@Howtohavesexpodcast EMAIL [email protected]

HOSTS: Jay-Jay Feeney – Media Personality Instagram/TikTok: @JJFeeneyNZ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/JayJayFeeney

Melissa Vranjes – Certified Somatic Sex & Relationship Coach www.melissavranjes.com Instagram: @melissavranjes

Ready to feel more confident, connected, and turned on in your body? Join Sex School here: https://www.melissavranjes.com/sex-school

Want more from Mel? She writes a weekly sex column for Woman's Day magazine. Pick up the latest issue to read it.

We launched our podcast on 25 March 2026 and had a party to celebrate. We would like to thank our incredible Day One supporters who kindly donated toward our party, and goodie bags.

Mad Dog Backdrops https://maddogbackdrops.co.nz/ Carmen Bird Photography https://www.carmenbirdphotography.co.nz/ Oh Cleoh Condoms https://www.ohcleoh.com/ Rumer Lube https://byrumer.co.nz/ Girls Get Off https://girlsgetoff.com/ Moodi Hormone Gummies https://www.moodiblends.com/ Cursive Craft https://cursivecraft.co.nz/ Eve Wellness https://evewellness.com/ XO Gifts https://xogifts.co.nz/ Framingham Wines https://framingham.co.nz/ Zeffer Cider & Alcoholic drinks https://zeffer.co.nz/ Woman’s Day Magazine https://www.nowtolove.co.nz/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

More from How To Have Sex

Oct 20, 2026

Have you ever looked at your bits and wondered, “Is that normal?”

Oct 13, 2026

Can you ever REALLY forgive someone for cheating? And even if you do, can your relationship ever be the same again?

Oct 6, 2026

Warning: there may be batteries. There may be buzzing. There will definitely be a Batman-shaped cock ring.

Sep 29, 2026

Not in the mood? It might not be your libido. You might just be really, really annoyed.

Sep 22, 2026

The best position isn’t necessarily the one that looks hottest in the Kama Sutra.

See all episodes →