140. Stage 2 Series: Stage 2 Rehab-What to Do When Deep Work Falls Apart
The Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused TherapyShow Notes
Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. Welcome back to The Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy. In this episode, Dr. James Hawkins and Dr. Ryan Rana discuss the concept of “Stage 2 Rehab” — the process of helping couples recover when deep emotional work becomes blocked, disorganized, or overwhelming. Rather than seeing difficult sessions as failures, James and Ryan explore how moments of fear, confusion, and protective relapse often become opportunities for deeper attachment repair when therapists know how to slow down, reorganize the process, and help clients regain safety. Why Stage 2 Work Can Collapse
Clients may not yet feel safe enough for depth Fear often interrupts vulnerability The caregiving system can become disoriented or blocked Therapists sometimes move too fast for the nervous system
Stage 2 Rehab Strategies
Return to the last successful emotional step Normalize fear and hesitation Slow the process down Regulate therapist energy and pacing Help clients climb “back up the ladder.” Reorganize emotional safety before pushing for more vulnerability
Highlighting Longing Beneath Pain Drawing from Gail Palmer’s work, James and Ryan discuss how helping clients contact longing—not just pain—can soften blocks and reopen emotional engagement. Resetting the Caregiving System The hosts explore how caregivers can become overwhelmed, defensive, solution-focused, or emotionally disorganized during deep moments — and how therapists can help restore accessibility and responsiveness. Therapist Takeaways
Don’t panic when the process breaks down Fear is often the doorway, not the obstacle Stay exploratory rather than perfectionistic Repairing the process is often the work itself
We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.
Stay connected with us:
Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com
If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV). Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together!
More from The Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy
Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other.
What happens when one partner needs emotional connection before sex, while the other experiences sex as one of the primary ways they feel emotionally connected? Too often, couples—and even therapists—get caught trying to decide which need should come first. In this episode, Dr. James Hawkins sits down with Dr. Laurie Watson, coauthor of Brave Love, Great Sex, for a rich conversation about why the emotional and sexual bonds in romantic relationships cannot be separated. Laurie explains how couples can become caught in two interconnected pursue-withdraw cycles: an emotional cycle and a sexual cycle. One partner may pursue emotionally while withdrawing sexually, while the other withdraws emotionally but reaches for connection through sex. Underneath both are familiar attachment questions: Do you want me? Do I matter to you? Will you respond to me? Am I safe needing you? James and Laurie explore how attachment history, childhood experiences with touch, body image, sexual functioning, anxiety, shame, and vulnerability can all shape what happens between partners in the bedroom. They also discuss why sexual withdrawal is not simply a lack of desire and sexual pursuit is not simply wanting more sex—both can be attempts to manage deeply vulnerable relational needs. Link to Brave Love Great Sex Podcast Amazon Link for Brave Love Great Sex Book Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other.
Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other.
Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other.
Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. In this episode, Dr. James Hawkins and Dr. Ryan Reyna walk into the heart of Stage 2 EFT and ask a hard question: How do you get the most out of YOU when every path forward involves pain? Drawing on stories from haunted houses, combat medicine, and oncology surgery, they unpack what it means to be the stronger, wiser other—not as a top-down expert, but as a steady, emotionally present guide when clients’ eyes are begging, “Please don’t make me go there.” You’ll hear how to: